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And she is definitely a goal-oriented woman! A much too competitive sport with too many rules for my taste! Be nice, smart and good looking no weirdos. Especially those who advertise themselves on the public market with such an amusing array of humorous, weird, and shocking words.

Her real self—her hopes and dreams, her fears and sorrows—will start to emerge, like a social mosaic, on the second date. I think we all get a little irked when we see messages on social networks that are garbled, and unreadable We can forgive typos, a little bad spelling, even some incorrect word use. In 1999, I study antique, chinese antique, porcelain. You're not for the others. Maven This supports the Maven widget and search functionality. The fastest path to funny dating ads a date is to stand out from the crowd. Cool parent is cool. I hold a black belt in Tae Kwon Do and am currently training in Judo.

Maven This supports the Maven widget and search functionality. Post a photo of yourself up on stage at the local comedy club, or perhaps, posed to resemble a Weird Al Yankovic album cover. Enjoy it and move on. They're modestly successful too.

Nine Funny Personal Ads from Dating Sites - If you want your online dating profile to work, you need to have some really good headlines that will attract as many visitors as possible.

Funny Personal Ads Funny Personals What follows are some profiles that I found on the web over the years that struck my fancy. I thought all of these were funny for one reason or another. I think you will enjoy them as well. Some profiles are funny in a funny way. Some people just have a knack for writing something witty or cute. None of these people are on match. It's hard to tell if this is funny or scary. Fill in the blanks: Padisha Emperor Shaddam IV's daughter is sexy; Shiny, slippery, smooth, curvy, laughing is sexier. In my bedroom, you'll find: A portal to the 6th dimension, where space-time is cheap megaphor, the laws of physics are reduced to a whim, and humans live in incomplete pairs with three people per body. Why you should get to know me: Because I'm funny. And people who say they are funny usually are, right? Because, like, why else would they say that? Also: because my shoes are exactly one foot long on the bottom. Because I need to meet you if you are who I think you are. And if you are-- you need to meet me too. Riggalee footyflut slut rut. More about who I'm looking for:... I'll just lie back and think pleasant thoughts. They think I'm crazy... But I know better... It is not I who am crazy... It is I who am MAD!... Didn't you hear 'em? Didn't you see the crowds?!! Oh my beloved ice cream bar... How I love to lick your creamy center... And your oh-so-nutty chocolate covering... You're not like the others... You like the same things I do... WE'RE NOT HITCHHIKING ANYMORE... Some profiles are funny in a sad way. When your audience is only your future spouse, one would think that a moment of proofreading would be the norm. Punctuation, capitalization, and spelling are apparently not high on some people's list. With this girl, capitalization is ALL OR nothing. I AM LOOKING FOR THAT SPECIAL GUY TO BE IN MY LIFE. HE NEEDS TO BE OUTGOING. HE ALSO HAS TO LIKE TO HAVE FUN AND PARTY AND OCCASSIONALLY GO OUT TO THE BARS. HE HAS TO ALSO BE ABLE TO JUST STAY AT HOME ONE NIGHT AND CUDDLE AND WATCH A MOVIE. I'M A VERY AFECTIOATE PERSON AND U ALSO HAVE TO BE. U HAVE TO LIKE ME FOR WHO I AM NOT WHAT I CAN DO FOR U OR WHAT U CAN DO FOR ME. LOOKS ARE NOT EVERYTHING IN A RELATIONSHIP ITS WHATS ON THE INSIDE THAT REALLY COUNTS. This same girl wrote me once and expected a response with the sorry profile below. I swear to you, I did not change a single letter of this... As for myself, how to say? I like smile and occasionally laugh, as my name tell you. I love nature and I am natural. I like tavelling, climbing and jogging outdoors. I like reading prose and fairy tale. If you do, we can share a lot. Sometimes I am motivated, but occasionally I am so lazy. How she describes her ideal match: hi, I have been waiting and lookng for the person in my life. I wish we can love each other, appreciate each other, encourage and support each other in difficulties. Anyway we can enjoy many things together, but we can give freedom to each other. I wish he is kind, which is most important, not only to me, to friends, but to all people and to the world. I wish he has passion for his work, his life and love them. Also he'd better not too cool. He like smile as much as me. Where is he and when he will come? It is better to like sports and travelling. Enjoy some of the following samples I've collected and try not to hurt yourself diagramming the sentences below. From Egypt How she describes herself: it is verey hard to talk about my self. How she describes herself I am very good , Believe me! Hi: I am XXXXXX , This is my name, From China. I find you and hope can make friend with you. The frist , I must say I am good girl and very beautiful. In 1999, I study antique, chinese antique, porcelain. Because I love chinese story and chinese handicraft article. And Now I have a job in Water supper company ,I am a secretary. I love cook, a good chef, love peaceful , not love noise and excitement,I think I'm gentle and quiet. I am very confident. I have a good family, My father is a civil servant. My sister 27years old , Married. Now I live with my parents. How she describes her ideal match: mature conscientious 28years old -35years old 174cm-188cm love China have good economic base conventional serious for love and marriage How she describes herself: Do you believe it will exist true love? Unfortunately I have never meet, will I have the lucky to meet it? Do you have the same dream? However, I think it must be exist true love and I can sure I could meet in some days. Frankly, it is very difficult to describe my personality. Some times I am an outgoing girl, but some times I am a tranquility girl. All my friends like me, as I am a very helpful person not only in my work, as well as in my life. And I am a pretty, tasty girl with typical traditional Chinese concept. Just write mail to me and it is a good start to get know more about me. And there's funny in a weird way. Below is a message from a 20 year old who wrote me note: I was 28 at the time. After that is her profile. What are you up to? I guess I'd be the girl you'd call a work in progress - but I'm young yet, there's time. I think a fun date might be bowling, just because I never go and I'm bad at it so it would give us something to do if there didn't turn out to be anything to talk about without any stress about doing too well. I decided to try the whole online dating scene primarily because all of my friends seem to be hooked up. Even if you still get a chance to go out together, you always ending up feeling like a third wheel, no matter how accommodating their significant other…. I would like to meet a guy who is really nice and caring. And they must have as a good personality and sense of humor and is willing to be there for me and others. And he must appreciate conjunctions as much as I do. I believe that there is someone higher thatn me and i do attend church once in awhile ON CAREER... My tern off has to be vidio games. I want a relation ship not a child. We've never even spoken on the phone and this is what she's telling me. Seriously, she wrote me about a half dozen messages that pertained exclusively to this topic. She complimenting me on my profile, and sounded interesting, but her reason for writing was that she used to live near where I was. Not moving to here. She used to live near here. Actually, this was a common occurrence for me. I guess that speaks volumes about what kind of relationship some people are looking for. If you read your profile on here, don't write me about it... I'll just laugh at you.